How long will I last?

My internet was turned off. My cable. My gas. I am only getting thirty dollars a week from my payee. I am literally staring at the walls and pacing. Why should I pay when ot was the landlord who refused to make repairs? I have no minutes. And no way to contact my family besides here at the library. If I tell people what’s going on they won’t do anything to help me. My depression is through the roof. Can’t afford the bus to apply at other apartments. And how would moving help anyway? DOn’t know how long I will last Can’t call a depression hotline. Or anyone else. Have asked a friend to pray but prayer won’t help I’ve tried it. Am getting seven hundred dollars a month but nobody will find out where it’s going. Have almost no furniture. With my Autism can’t cope much longer. Getting “treated” with  Psychotropics makes things worse. Feel like people would be happy if I wasn’t here. Don’t believe what anybody says.Will try to keep going to look after my cat. But how long till my rent is not paid? Will I spend another one hundred and thirty one days in a hotel without my kitty? Wouldn’t survivie that again. Don’t know where to turn. AM using the internet on the computer at the library. I use the internet at home to cope.


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